Wednesday, October 19, 2011
Heavy
This is a heavy week ... a friend lies dying in his bed at home. I don't know if I will see him again one day or not. The few times that my beliefs regarding God came up in conversation in the past, my Jewish friend became rather riled. He's unconscious now, and declining by the hour. It is so hard to see him slipping away, when I do not know his destination. I keep praying for him. All I can do.
Monday, September 12, 2011
"The Insider"
I've just watched the movie "The Insider" for the first time, this morning. So many thoughts and emotions have been crowding my mind, that I'm not sure I can compose them succinctly ... but I'm going to try.
First of all, I was particularly interested in seeing this film due to the fact that it's based upon historical events, and that it's regarding ordinary people who perform extraordinary actions, under immense pressure, in the interest of their fellow human beings ~ us. How many people these days will make such sacrifices? When has more than a minority of the human race ever done so?
Secondly, hearing that it was regarding the tobacco industry, I was interested for two reasons ~ 1) I've been an occasional smoker for years, and 2) our family has old friends in the tobacco industry (my sister was even once engaged to be married to the son of an RJR executive, before he died in a tragic automobile accident), and our family used to grow tobacco on our family farm in NC, before it completely converted into a horse breeding farm (due to my brother's tobacco allergy).
This tale moved me to tears and beyond, on many fronts.
How many of us humans, no matter our station in life, would knowingly and willingly put our lives on the line, and those of our family members, in every way possible, for the good of others? Especially for millions we will never know? And especially if there are no guarantees that our sacrifices will ever see the light of day (except with those affected ~ us, individually, and our families)? Not many, apparently. It's easy to judge Mrs. Wigand, since most of us will never experience what this family experienced. I found myself doing so, however. I don't believe this is something I could have done (I have a deep desire for honour and justice). This is something on which I will need to 'work,' within myself, however ~ the tendency to so quickly judge others. I mean, the only person who's ever tried to kill me was my mother, before I was born. I don't know what it's like to have someone actively threatening to kill myself and/or my family. Objectively, I don't believe that we can sit in judgement upon Mrs. Wigand for her decisions regarding her family's safety and sanity. I do, however, sincerely hope that Dr. Wigand's children will forever stand firmly and with great esteem by their father's side, for his honourable actions.
I also find myself in a quandary regarding our family friends: how can one feel close to, or even respectful of, anyone who engages in such despicable and blatant destruction of one's fellow man? It's hard to imagine that anyone in such a business is ignorant of the fact that they're living off of the business of death, when the general public is so aware. And even more so, when these same companies who don't mind killing others with their products in order to feed their own greed, will also treat other human beings so violently, when they attempt to expose them? How can one sleep at night, when one knows that the very pillow upon which they rest was funded by someone else's life (in more ways than one)?
And what does that say about people who purchase these instruments/vehicles of death (in more ways than one)?
I thank God that I never have been truly addicted to such a thing ... that somehow my freakish body (one with high tolerance to substances, that is normally a problem) has withstood the carcinogens found in these death traps, and I've only submitted to them occasionally. After seeing this tale of death (in more ways than one), diabolical greed, and violence, how can I ever contribute one more cent of my money to such death mongers?
God bless Dr. Jeffrey Wigand, his family, Mr. Lowell Bergman and his family, everyone who was a part of bringing this information to light, and the actors and filmmakers who brought the story to the screen as a compact tale.
The performances by Al Pacino and Russell Crowe were so riveting that these men were lost in the characters they portrayed (which is the point, no?). The doggedness of Lowell Bergman's character was strongly portrayed by Al Pacino, and the range of depth and torn emotions within Dr. Wigand's character were remarkably portrayed by Russell Crowe (but then, that is what we've come to expect from this uniquely gifted and terribly hard-working performer, yes?). Highly recommended.
First of all, I was particularly interested in seeing this film due to the fact that it's based upon historical events, and that it's regarding ordinary people who perform extraordinary actions, under immense pressure, in the interest of their fellow human beings ~ us. How many people these days will make such sacrifices? When has more than a minority of the human race ever done so?
Secondly, hearing that it was regarding the tobacco industry, I was interested for two reasons ~ 1) I've been an occasional smoker for years, and 2) our family has old friends in the tobacco industry (my sister was even once engaged to be married to the son of an RJR executive, before he died in a tragic automobile accident), and our family used to grow tobacco on our family farm in NC, before it completely converted into a horse breeding farm (due to my brother's tobacco allergy).
This tale moved me to tears and beyond, on many fronts.
How many of us humans, no matter our station in life, would knowingly and willingly put our lives on the line, and those of our family members, in every way possible, for the good of others? Especially for millions we will never know? And especially if there are no guarantees that our sacrifices will ever see the light of day (except with those affected ~ us, individually, and our families)? Not many, apparently. It's easy to judge Mrs. Wigand, since most of us will never experience what this family experienced. I found myself doing so, however. I don't believe this is something I could have done (I have a deep desire for honour and justice). This is something on which I will need to 'work,' within myself, however ~ the tendency to so quickly judge others. I mean, the only person who's ever tried to kill me was my mother, before I was born. I don't know what it's like to have someone actively threatening to kill myself and/or my family. Objectively, I don't believe that we can sit in judgement upon Mrs. Wigand for her decisions regarding her family's safety and sanity. I do, however, sincerely hope that Dr. Wigand's children will forever stand firmly and with great esteem by their father's side, for his honourable actions.
I also find myself in a quandary regarding our family friends: how can one feel close to, or even respectful of, anyone who engages in such despicable and blatant destruction of one's fellow man? It's hard to imagine that anyone in such a business is ignorant of the fact that they're living off of the business of death, when the general public is so aware. And even more so, when these same companies who don't mind killing others with their products in order to feed their own greed, will also treat other human beings so violently, when they attempt to expose them? How can one sleep at night, when one knows that the very pillow upon which they rest was funded by someone else's life (in more ways than one)?
And what does that say about people who purchase these instruments/vehicles of death (in more ways than one)?
I thank God that I never have been truly addicted to such a thing ... that somehow my freakish body (one with high tolerance to substances, that is normally a problem) has withstood the carcinogens found in these death traps, and I've only submitted to them occasionally. After seeing this tale of death (in more ways than one), diabolical greed, and violence, how can I ever contribute one more cent of my money to such death mongers?
God bless Dr. Jeffrey Wigand, his family, Mr. Lowell Bergman and his family, everyone who was a part of bringing this information to light, and the actors and filmmakers who brought the story to the screen as a compact tale.
The performances by Al Pacino and Russell Crowe were so riveting that these men were lost in the characters they portrayed (which is the point, no?). The doggedness of Lowell Bergman's character was strongly portrayed by Al Pacino, and the range of depth and torn emotions within Dr. Wigand's character were remarkably portrayed by Russell Crowe (but then, that is what we've come to expect from this uniquely gifted and terribly hard-working performer, yes?). Highly recommended.
Sunday, August 28, 2011
Want to be "first?' Be 'last!'
Really good notes from church this morning:
Pastor spoke regarding Luke 22:24-30, where Jesus' disciples were arguing about greatness: 24 Now there was also a dispute among them, as to which of them should be considered the greatest. 25 And He said to them, “The kings of the Gentiles exercise lordship over them, and those who exercise authority over them are called ‘benefactors.’ 26 But not so among you; on the contrary, he who is greatest among you, let him be as the younger, and he who governs as he who serves. 27 For who is greater, he who sits at the table, or he who serves? Is it not he who sits at the table? Yet I am among you as the One who serves.
28 “But you are those who have continued with Me in My trials. 29 And I bestow upon you a kingdom, just as My Father bestowed one upon Me, 30 that you may eat and drink at My table in My kingdom, and sit on thrones judging the twelve tribes of Israel.”
Such irony! After having heard the Christ speak so often, they still didn't 'get it.' They still thought that they needed to jockey for position 'in the kingdom,' as we do even now, eh?
But Jesus served people! He served his disciples, even as he served others. He showed us how to 'be first' ~ by 'being last!' Not to expect people to serve us, and not to serve others for notoriety, but simply in order to serve!
We say we are 'of Christ' ~ what are we going to do with that?
In verses 28-30, the disciples have been exposed in their petty thoughts, but still he rejoices over them, and promises them greatness and blessings beyond their wildest dreams! (He knows we're human and faulty, and loves us anyway!)
Don't try to be perfect ~ just be faithful.
Great quote from C. S. Lewis's "Mere Christianity" ~
Wow ... good stuff.
Pastor spoke regarding Luke 22:24-30, where Jesus' disciples were arguing about greatness: 24 Now there was also a dispute among them, as to which of them should be considered the greatest. 25 And He said to them, “The kings of the Gentiles exercise lordship over them, and those who exercise authority over them are called ‘benefactors.’ 26 But not so among you; on the contrary, he who is greatest among you, let him be as the younger, and he who governs as he who serves. 27 For who is greater, he who sits at the table, or he who serves? Is it not he who sits at the table? Yet I am among you as the One who serves.
28 “But you are those who have continued with Me in My trials. 29 And I bestow upon you a kingdom, just as My Father bestowed one upon Me, 30 that you may eat and drink at My table in My kingdom, and sit on thrones judging the twelve tribes of Israel.”
Such irony! After having heard the Christ speak so often, they still didn't 'get it.' They still thought that they needed to jockey for position 'in the kingdom,' as we do even now, eh?
But Jesus served people! He served his disciples, even as he served others. He showed us how to 'be first' ~ by 'being last!' Not to expect people to serve us, and not to serve others for notoriety, but simply in order to serve!
We say we are 'of Christ' ~ what are we going to do with that?
Why do we need to compare ourselves with others, or worry about what others think, when the God of the universe is "rejoice[ing] over [us] with singing??" ( Zephaniah 3:17)
In verses 28-30, the disciples have been exposed in their petty thoughts, but still he rejoices over them, and promises them greatness and blessings beyond their wildest dreams! (He knows we're human and faulty, and loves us anyway!)
Don't try to be perfect ~ just be faithful.
Great quote from C. S. Lewis's "Mere Christianity" ~
But there must be a real giving up of the self. You must throw it away ‘blindly’ so to speak. Christ will indeed give you a real personality: but you must not go to Him for the sake of that. As long as your own personality is what you are bothering about you are not going to Him at all. The very first step is to try to forget about the self altogether. Your real, new self (which is Christ’s and also yours, and yours just because it is His) will not come as long as you are looking for it. It will come when you are looking for Him. Does that sound strange? The same principle holds, you know, for more everyday matters. Even in social life, you will never make a good impression on other people until you stop thinking about what sort of impression you are making. Even in literature and art, no man who bothers about originality will ever be original: whereas if you simply try to tell the truth (without caring twopence how often it has been told before) you will, nine times out of ten, become original without ever having noticed it. The principle runs through all life from top to bottom. Give up yourself, and you will find your real self. Lose your life and you will save it.
Submit to death, death of your ambitions and favourite wishes every day and death of your whole body in the end: submit with every fibre of your being, and you will find eternal life. Keep back nothing. Nothing that you have not given away will be really yours. Nothing in you that has not died will ever be raised from the dead. Look for yourself, and you will find in the long run only hatred, loneliness, despair, rage, ruin, and decay. But look for Christ and you will find Him, and with Him everything else thrown in.
Submit to death, death of your ambitions and favourite wishes every day and death of your whole body in the end: submit with every fibre of your being, and you will find eternal life. Keep back nothing. Nothing that you have not given away will be really yours. Nothing in you that has not died will ever be raised from the dead. Look for yourself, and you will find in the long run only hatred, loneliness, despair, rage, ruin, and decay. But look for Christ and you will find Him, and with Him everything else thrown in.
Wow ... good stuff.
Thursday, August 11, 2011
Hope
Many days, I realise what a walking miracle I am ... but then, many days, I feel as if I'm just a walking mess.
Trying to remember what Beth Moore says about demoralisation ~ that it is a tool of Satan to discourage us. He watches us to learn what our worst fears are, about ourselves, and what we could/will become, then he plies us with the fear that we ARE becoming that.
BUT, we are loved, chosen, adopted, accepted, redeemed, forgiven, and blessed, by God!
Ephesians 1:3-8 ~ Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ, 4 just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before Him in love, 5 having predestined us to adoption as sons by Jesus Christ to Himself, according to the good pleasure of His will, 6 to the praise of the glory of His grace, by which He made us accepted in the Beloved.
7 In Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of sins, according to the riches of His grace 8 which He made to abound toward us in all wisdom and prudence,
God is who he says he is! God can do what he says he can do!
Now, to actually believe that, instead of the garbage I've always been taught about myself by my family. That I wasn't wanted, shouldn't have been born, have been the cause of all of my family's problems, and should be happy to have been allowed to live in their home, and to have to act as a servant to them.
I am so glad I finally learned that this was their problem, and not mine! However, the issues from those years of training are hard to overcome ... they have been the backdrop of my life for ever since I can remember. So hard to rid myself of this, although I have other family and many friends who are great people, who love me much and actively.
Trying to remember what Beth Moore says about demoralisation ~ that it is a tool of Satan to discourage us. He watches us to learn what our worst fears are, about ourselves, and what we could/will become, then he plies us with the fear that we ARE becoming that.
BUT, we are loved, chosen, adopted, accepted, redeemed, forgiven, and blessed, by God!
Ephesians 1:3-8 ~ Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ, 4 just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before Him in love, 5 having predestined us to adoption as sons by Jesus Christ to Himself, according to the good pleasure of His will, 6 to the praise of the glory of His grace, by which He made us accepted in the Beloved.
7 In Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of sins, according to the riches of His grace 8 which He made to abound toward us in all wisdom and prudence,
God is who he says he is! God can do what he says he can do!
I am who God says I am! I can do all things through Christ! God's word is alive and active in me!
Now, to actually believe that, instead of the garbage I've always been taught about myself by my family. That I wasn't wanted, shouldn't have been born, have been the cause of all of my family's problems, and should be happy to have been allowed to live in their home, and to have to act as a servant to them.
I am so glad I finally learned that this was their problem, and not mine! However, the issues from those years of training are hard to overcome ... they have been the backdrop of my life for ever since I can remember. So hard to rid myself of this, although I have other family and many friends who are great people, who love me much and actively.
Jeremiah 31:3 ~ The LORD has appeared of old to me, saying: Yes, I have loved you with an everlasting love; therefore with lovingkindness I have drawn you.
Jeremiah 29:11 ~ For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.
Friday, July 15, 2011
John 15:1-17
1I am the true vine, and my Father is the husbandman.2Every branch in me that beareth not fruit he taketh away: and every branch that beareth fruit, he purgeth it, that it may bring forth more fruit.
3Now ye are clean through the word which I have spoken unto you.
4Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself, except it abide in the vine; no more can ye, except ye abide in me.
5I am the vine, ye are the branches: He that abideth in me, and I in him, the same bringeth forth much fruit: for without me ye can do nothing.
6If a man abide not in me, he is cast forth as a branch, and is withered; and men gather them, and cast them into the fire, and they are burned.
7If ye abide in me, and my words abide in you, ye shall ask what ye will, and it shall be done unto you.
8Herein is my Father glorified, that ye bear much fruit; so shall ye be my disciples.
9As the Father hath loved me, so have I loved you: continue ye in my love.
10If ye keep my commandments, ye shall abide in my love; even as I have kept my Father's commandments, and abide in his love.
11These things have I spoken unto you, that my joy might remain in you, and that your joy might be full.
12This is my commandment, That ye love one another, as I have loved you.
13Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.
14Ye are my friends, if ye do whatsoever I command you.
15Henceforth I call you not servants; for the servant knoweth not what his lord doeth: but I have called you friends; for all things that I have heard of my Father I have made known unto you. 16Ye have not chosen me, but I have chosen you, and ordained you, that ye should go and bring forth fruit, and that your fruit should remain: that whatsoever ye shall ask of the Father in my name, he may give it you.
17These things I command you, that ye love one another.
Thursday, July 14, 2011
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